You Are Who Matters

Note: This article takes no side for or against social media’s various platforms. As creator of the Get Happy Now program, it is being written to share knowledge, concerns and strategies that nurture the five essential elements for happiness.

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The proliferate use of social media by most all demographics has become a normalized informational resource. Whether you are researching product reviews and services, catching up on friends’ (or sharing your own) life events, learning the latest news across a broad spectrum of subjects, social media platforms are often the tools we rely on to inform thoughts and prompt actions in nearly every aspect of our lives.

You cannot control the behavior of others, but you can always choose how you respond to it. – Roy T. Bennett

Increasingly, people are noticing that social media is affecting them in various negative ways that range from time sucking doom-scrolling to online disagreements with ‘friends’. As a retiree you may have more time to spend reading, posting and engaging with others on social media. But if that engagement is causing you stress, maybe it’s time to take a vacation from a potentially toxic environment that could only be bad for your health.

That said, here are two things we should all know prior to citing (or believing) social media to be a source of true and reliable information.

• The internet was once referred to as the World Wide Web, and even now, many websites begin with www. Using a web analogy, the web is populated in part by spiders known as bots, short for robots. These bots are software programs that can automatically process every move you make on the internet at a faster speed than is humanly possible and can even imitate human behavior. There are good bots and bad bots. Good bots help you identify resources like customer service and shopping assistance. Bad bots send spam, create fake social media accounts, steal personal information, spread misinformation and crash websites. Bots are to social media what water is to crops.

• Social media companies are not legally required to ensure that user-posted content is accurate. In fact, social media companies are protected from civil liability for hosting inaccurate or false information. Platforms set their own guidelines and terms of service regarding content. One thing is for sure: Social media companies prioritize their well being (financial) over yours (mental and physical) in every and any way possible.

The computing principle, “garbage in, garbage out”, (GIGO) states that flawed or poor quality input data results in flawed or poor quality output, regardless of how sophisticated the processing system is. GIGO is also a logic principle. We know that the food we eat affects our health. If you hydrate and cleanse by drinking sufficient water; eat natural foods containing the fiber, vitamins and nutrients your organs need to function properly, your body will reward you with good health. Indulge in foods that contain excess sugar and salt; are processed, fried or genetically altered, your body will eventually rebel and subject you to a diminished lifestyle.

Just like the computing application of the GIGO principle, what we read (input) affects our thoughts and actions (output). Generally speaking, people feel empowered by the ability to express themselves online in social media platforms. Being in the comfort and security of one’s home can do that, so filtering opinions isn’t necessarily at the top of mind. If you find yourself disturbed or stressed out by what you read in the social media forums, e.g., news (especially politically based), please consider either limiting your online participation or taking a Social Media Vacation (SMV). I recommend that you put yourself in a proper frame of mind so that you’re able to peacefully disconnect and not experience Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) during your SMV, and offer the following for your consideration.

• You can most always ‘catch up’ later. The digital world is permanent. Even when information is deleted, it still exists somewhere if you feel the need to visit a past that has little if any purpose or relevance to the present. In the words of Nelson Mandela: “May your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears.”

• It is nearly impossible to find two people who think exactly the same on every subject. Opinions are always subjective. Individuals choose their likes, dislikes and beliefs, based on their lived and learned experience; not necessarily based on facts. You cannot build your self worth based on the opinions of a population this unstable.

• If you find yourself at an impasse with someone, end the conversation gracefully and accept that you both are entitled to your opinions. Disagree without being disagreeable, and cease future reference to the disagreeable subject. No good can come from an argument where both sides refuse to change their mind. Let it go.

The more decisions that you are forced to make alone, the more you are aware of your freedom to choose. – Thornton Wilder

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